You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
My body has become completely dependent on Text Twist. I can't poop without it.
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
My girlfriend was pissed, so if I had to guess, i'd say I had a GREAT time last night
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I've had more lap dances than hrs of sleep since Thursday, this is why you're planning all three of my bachelor parties
there's people who respect me enough not to bang on my bed and i think that's beautiful
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
I mean, if you want to light yourself on fire for maximum accuracy, far be it from me to stop you
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Randomize
