omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
We discussed our relationship status. We're dating exclusively. And the conversation was followed by him saying "C'mon baby, let's make you orgasm!" .....I'm gonna marry him.
my girlfriend just compared my daughters eyes to gollum from lord of the rings.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
once again, we need to groom him to be a better human being. using liquor and tits.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
I'm so drunk. Liken realign drink
Like really drunk?
Or did you enjoy repositioning your drink?
Drunk wound on my leg hast healed and neither has my dignity
I got propositioned to get involved with an engaged couple. I told them I didn't think my married couple would like me to see other couples...
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
