the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
even after i explained my bobby knight costume the bartender still kicked me out for throwing the chair
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
His wife found out about our affair the same day he got fired for it.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
