My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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