We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
ive cried into many a lonely burritos..
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Randomize
