he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I got fingered by sexual harassment panda last night, by a van, I can't remember if he took off his furry panda hands...
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
He hid IN a snowbank for 2 hours waiting for me to come home. This game has to stop before someone dies.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
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