Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
honey bunches of taint.
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Drunk me obviously wants to fuck up my life
It's like I have an arch nemesis, and it's me
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
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