...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
apparently the secret to your success is patron
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
then he pulled down his pants, and i just stared for about a minute..... i was so confused. i didnt know my cat could have a bigger penis than an 18 year old man.
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
I'm cleaning my apartment while naked. Anyone who says that's not why they want to live on their own is lying.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
he just asked me that if he was a penguin and I was a penguin if I would fuck him
Randomize
