I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Two portable blenders. We are going to be popular and dangerous.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
What's the best way to say, "it's too early in our relationship to leave me at your place alone"? Steal something?
Anything you tell me within three minutes of an orgasm isn't even being recorded in my head.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Randomize
