Getting fucked up met up rando with a girl I confesswed my love for last night. weird, going with it
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
I'm hoping to finish this bottle of wine before I pass out, I don't want the remainder spilling on my white down comforter.
He turned me down because he was still doing his taxes.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
My next goal in this relationship is to teach my boyfriend that there are valid reasons to be fear of dolphins completely.
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
