remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
woke up on my stairs with half a hot dog beside me and the last text I sent was "i make hot dog in toasTer" .
At the time, making out with dudes for keg money seemed like a genius idea. Now I realize it was borderline prostitution.
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
Bon Iver should never be played when you just ate shrooms.
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
"I feel morally obligated to vote for him since he's my drug dealers dad"
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
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