So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
someone left their shoes, a resume, and a pizza in the shower... i am actually speechless
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
I just laid my head on this pillow and I smelt your penis. It was comforting.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Randomize
