We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
im spending all my christmas money on new years parafanalia aka things I will ingest or lose by the next morning
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
My fuck buddy took time out of his date with his girlfriend to text me happy Valentines Day.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
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