can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
every time I see Anne Hathaway all I can think is "my cousin fucked a guy who fucked her" and it makes me proud.... so I want to say thank you for being that cousin.
Just when I think I'm the one with the problem, I get home for the holidays and the family shows me what alcoholism is really about
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I don't have patience to seek someone out and try to decipher whether or not I think I'd want to actually have their dick in my face.
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
I'll probably just end up banging you in your parents marital bed,in their honor of course.
Is it okay to get drunk at a baby shower? ....asking for a friend
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Randomize