No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
put something nutritious in your body. AND NOT JUST THAT JOINT.
I wanted one last NYC adventure and I got it. Now I just have to figure out a polite way to wake up the pantless former stripper illegal Russian immigrant street violinist chick currently in a vodka coma in my bed.
Randomize
