We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
I'm mailing you cans of corn and that's final.
In all honesty the person most likely to secretly slip me drugs would be ... Me
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Randomize