Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I'm at this poker game and this kid to my left is bragging about all the chicks he hits including a "playboy model" when all of a sudden this 22 guy looks him in the eye and says "ever fuck a 70 woman. The things they can and are willing to do" Next think the whole table is quiet for an hour. That guys my hero...
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
1. Sorry about making it snow. 2. If it left a mess, I will be over to clean it. 3. Can that fire extinguisher still be used? If not, I'll buy a new one. 4. I just wanted to make it snow!
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
I told my manager I was trying to conserve my energy for date night/Sexual Olympics later. That's legit for another break, right?
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
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