i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
So this text is costing me two dollars because I'm out of the country, but I just wanted to let you know it went well with the stripper last night
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
Second day of summer classes and i already got this girl to send me nudes during class
that is WHY your in summer classes
worth it
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
THIS IS A FLATMATE WARNING! The white powder next to sink is washing powder I spilled and is not meant for human comsumption. I repeat- do not digest, snort or smoke the white powder next to the sink!!!!
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
Just find a separated / divorcing man. They’re too upset to fall in love, too helpless to be alone and too horny to think straight. Smile at him the right way and he’ll be thrilled to be with a sexy younger woman!
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
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