i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
The drugstore has summer clearance. I bought you a little mermaid bucket. Now your hangovers will feel more like childhood adventures.
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
how do you ask an olympian for your underwear back?
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
I'm having a funeral for my vibrator. Please be there. I need your dick for support.
I can't tell if this is a hangover or just a perfect combination of shame and regret
Randomize
