yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
i looked at my phone and realized all i had said to her the entire night was misspelled variations of "NOTHING IS THE SAME" over and over. she eventually stopped replying.
Speaking of ejaculate, did you get the side of your car cleaned off?
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
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