The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
Say "Steve Buscemi is hot." with a straight face.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
he thinks im joking when i say don't visit. i mean it's summer...he was the college fuck and now it's time for the summer fuck
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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