I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
