yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
I woke up in what appears to be a taco bell graveyard in my bed.
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I don't want a baby! I JUST WANT AN ORGASM THAT ISN'T SELF INFLICTED.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Well I just masturbated while reading a recipe for Alfredo sauce so I guess you could say I’m growing up
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