i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
My entire floor is waiting for the couple to come out of the shower. She's a screamer. We've blockaded them
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
When she said "Tighten your safety belt and hold on!", that should have been a clear sign to me that one should never go off-roading in a rental car. On the bright side, they were able to tow her car out the next morning.
Is it weird to befriend your older alcoholic landlords?
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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