I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Considering we're about to fuck, I really need your girlfriend to stop liking all my Facebook posts.
I have a few Facebook friends I only keep around for quality control purposes on Tinder
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
Side note: I apologize for sex being the subject of every single one of my texts. That's what happens when you date an older man who constantly denies you sex on the basis of his ridiculous morals.
Randomize
