I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
I just rolled an Obama blunt and a Romney shame joint for tonight. Vote wisely.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
