Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I wannas sexs uuuuu
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
Im currently watching two girls making out. In the library. Hope your studying is going as good as mine is. Haha
God dammit not the cupcake channel. Not when I'm high.
He told me he loved me. I didn't know what to say so i just squirted the baby oil at him
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Way to fucking accidentally drunk dial me while you're talking to and buying other girls drinks. Don't call me.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
