I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
got fuckng wasted at spring training, got a lap dance at le girls, got a burrito at filibertos, and still made it to my 5 o'clock eco class wearing a bikini top....I love Arizona State University
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Randomize
