He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
The only reason we got away with streaking last time was cuz we had those miner hats
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I want to be stormed in. I want to be stuck there. I want to climb a pyramid of strippers to safety
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
The cab driver gave me a church card yesterday and said I should reconnect with god.
Then he gave me 2 tickets to a movie he's going to be in
What the hell man, you basically stole my girlfriend with a bucket of KFC.
Like do I send him a nude to ease his mind off his brother having a stroke? I'm not very good with words when it comes to consoling... I would be a terrible mother.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
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