i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
Well, I just bought plan b with the tips I made from the job that I slept with my manager. So yeah, that's my life. How's yours?
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
All I ever do is give guys anxiety problems and flaccid penises.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
Randomize
