Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
This is stressing me out. I feel like I need to eat the dick.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
I know we agreed to cock block each other from now on buttt I WANT this one. I have felt his penis, it is godly, and I am going to have it inside of me, so shut the fuck up and leave.
A black cat walked my drunken ass home last night and made sure I made it back into the apartment safe. Sat with me for 30 minutes as I struggled to unlock the door. Guardian angel or drunken hallucinations?
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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