I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Let's buy some Wrangler jeans and be real live men.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I'm bleeding and have questions
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
