please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
I don't know how it happened, one minute we were talking about Huck Finn, the next minute I was blowing him behind the corner of his apartment building.
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
We are going to get clementines. And shoot them out of a ballon launcher. That's after we come up to the ivy with a bullhorn and reck havoc. Where are you.
I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I honestly don't think it will ever get topped. Unless a real female cop arrests me, then fucks me. That's it.
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
coughing up blood. I'm leaving for the doctor now. P.S. I just won $350 on the wheel of fortune machine in the casino.
I had to break up with her. She was sending me study schedules and recipes for vegan lasagna. I’m just trying to survive man
Randomize
