Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
It was like god placed me in his bed and said," here's your shot girl. Don't mess this up." And I looked at god and laughed in his face.
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
If my neighbors have super loud sex again tonight, I'm going to leave a ball-gag and roll of duct tape in their mail slot.
An old white couple caught us smoking the foot long. THE LOOK ON THEIR FACES.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Randomize
