Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Sooo just headbutted a stripper, meet you outside
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
Guess who has got hockey tickets for tonight? Only cost me road head going to and coming from the game
The only image of you you know is from reflections or pictures. Its 2d. But what other people see is 3d. How do you know that's your real face! MIND.BLOWN.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Evvvvvveryone knows we hooked up in the DJ booth. People call it the BJ booth now. I've created a legacy
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
He was playing minecraft so I took a shower with my vibrator
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
