All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
Randomize