You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
Not after That Night. No. I hate tequila. And it hates me. Very mutual hateship going on.
I need to stop acting like a drunk bitch. People are going to get the right idea about me...
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Randomize
