Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
I feel like after that many guys, all of the water in your body is just replaced with pure jizz, honestly.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
Didn't shower and drew a couple dicks on my face before I went to work. Boss sent me home. Sacrificed my dignity for a 3 day weekend with you guys.
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I think all the guys I've fucked in my life would get along perfectly. They'd probably form an orchestra and travel the fucking world. That gives me the slightest feeling of consistency in life which is great.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
IT'S MY BIRTHDAY. I SHOULDN'T HAVE TO DRIVE 3 HOURS FOR BIRTHDAY SEX.
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