I am puke
The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
shes laying on the floor in a bowl of salsa with her pants half off and she's crying... i dont know what to do...
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
He put chocks of wood in front of his doors to stop me from leaving. I'm not nearly drunk enough for that to be appropriate behaviour.
They should incorporate dolphins into professional surfing
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize
