My text messages all automatically add Zs on them cause of your skank ass messages you send me
S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Was just shown the photos from a professional photoshoot my aunt had for their dog...not drunk enough for this...
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
any chance you can send me your legal ethics outline, in exchange for say, me buying you a lapdance the next time we go to the strip club?
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
I am almost positive I asked to milk her when I was saying my goodbyes.
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I think I may be going on too many job interviews. I've started to bring up Shonda Rhimes in my interview answers.
DO NOT TRY TO APPROACH HER CAT. IT IS A DEMON CAT FROM SATAN'S BALLS AND IT *WILL* TRY TO KILL YOU. I SPEAK FROM EXPIRENCE.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
He referred to our sex as "an Olympic event." My tits are bruised.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
Randomize