Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
in spanish class. the girl next to me asked what Galapagos were. i told her they were islands. now she thinks Galapagos means islands in spanish
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
I was hoping for a marriage proposal... Or at least an offer to sleep in his bed.
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
I'm standing up, for my all my brothers and sisters, and fighting against whiskey dick.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
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