so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
just chased whiskey with a pickle. i definitely recommend it
You know its bad when you can over hear the planned parenthood nurses talking shit behind your back... they've seen everything
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
How many of my tattoos need to be visible for an outfit to be considered "see-through"?
You were so drunk, you called my cruise control, the "auto pilot" and asked my car politely to take us to Taco Bell.
When do you want to get tanked and forget our entire college education?
Idk but she keeps giving me s'mores and I'm having a hard time caring about her alcoholism because of it
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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