that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
i cant be the least bit upset about his new gf cause all i think is that she has to put things in his ass
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
did i walk over a car last night?
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
I puked right in front of him after winning beer olympics and he still hooked up with me. My life is so easy.
its like what part of i just threw up mcdonalds breakfast means i want to make out with you?
I whispered "you're doing a great Job" when he was fucking me. Then high fived him.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
Ya apperently its not "appropriate" to fuck in the school auditorium
Im watching animal planet drunk, watching a documentary on mermaids. Tonight has not gone to waste.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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