my underwear are soaked with white zifandel yet i have continued to wear them despite the fact im at home
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
July 5th AKA Day of regret AKA picnicing in a laundromat. Someone puked allover the comforter. Liffe of champions.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
thanks again for a nice night (and please don't fuck my boss)
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Pretty sure I was naked for most of the night.....success
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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