i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
No subtext here. People are naked.
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I just took a shower and I feel like 20 pounds of sex just came off of me.
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
sex in a hospital.. check
Paige is home safe.
Actually, she's here now, punching me in the face. You should've kept her keys.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
The guy I blew who bought us all the shots last night? I really think he's the TV guy I'm watching give the local weather. Like right now.
Randomize