he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
ITS A JAGER BOTTLE. NOTHING CAN BE BAD IF ITS JAGER RELATED.
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I might volunteer to give breath samples on the 17th where I would be required to get drunk and then give samples! THE POLICE WOULD PAY ME AND PROVIDE THE ALCOHOL!
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
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