its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
Houston, we have a squirter
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
foreskin is a definite game changer
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
60% of the guys I've slept with are on my holiday greeting card mailing list. I'm an amazing ex lover.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
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