Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
can u get pink eye on your cock?
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
The thing is you're all "holy crap this isn't nearly as bad as I thought pissing on my own face would be."
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
His PENIS is so fucking big that I always use caps, out of respect.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
I'm pretty sure she tried to draw a self portrait out of her vomit. Then you tried to help, but passed out in the vomit.
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