its not stalking. its research.
I told her I would melt her with my mustache. Needless to say, he pants were soon off.
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
Apparently "Welcome to the Sin Cave" is not how I'm supposed to answer the door
Buying a new pipe this morning, and setting up career plans this afternoon. It's called balance
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
My life is far to together for someone who's such a hot mess inside
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