Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
The meeting is at the same hotel we go to for sex. Avoiding eye contact with all the staff there.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Making a mobile stripper pole for the back of my truck memorial weekend. Is where dignity goes to die
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
when i saw him today i think my vagina did the equivalent of a stomach growl... its been to long
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
