And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
I just put up a picture on my dorm room wall of that ginger you hooked up with to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
